(CAM 1) LONDON, ENGLAND-- A young girl by the name of Alice went missing Thursday evening and there has been no sign of her since. She is about 13-years-old, blonde and was last seen wearing a purple dress. Please contact the local police if you have any information on her whereabouts. Her family is frantic to receive any type of information.
(CAM 2) Alice's mom: We have no idea what could've happened to our little girl. She is about 5 feet tall, but carries herself with poise and confidence as if she were much bigger and older. She is very intelligent and friendly, although she doesn't have many friends of her own. She spends most of her time with her older sister at home since we homeschool them. Alice has a huge imagination and is a very curious girl, so she could really be anywhere by now, it's been three days since we have seen her.
*Alice clicks the TV off and shakes her head*
Alice felt so bad about abandoning her family, but she had every intention to return some day. She didn't even mean to run away, she was just wandering through her garden picking out some of her favorite flowers when she stumbled into a rabbit hole. It turns out it wasn't just any rabbit hole, once she fell in, she plopped to the bottom and found a set of wooden doors, painted with bright, vibrant colors. Of course, instead of climbing out of the hole and returning home, Alice opened them up and walked right through. She was instantly amazed by what she saw. There was a pathway of flat, white rocks, with trees blossoming with pink and purple flowers lining each side. She skipped down the pathway to find a small cottage. She looked around, wondering how a place could be so serene, yet so lively at the same time. "How did I never know any of this was here?" thought Alice. She opened the door of the cottage and found it was filled with everything a normal home would have, but there were animals of all shapes and sizes living inside. She quickly made friends with all of them, although they were frightened of her at first. When she found there was a TV, she kept it going because if her family was seriously in need of her, she was going to return. Until then, she wanted to explore this new little world that caused her curiosity to explode and her mind to overflow with excitement. As she looked around outside, she thought, "This is absolutely wonderful, I think I'll call it Wonderland." In Wonderland, the sky was bluer, the clouds were fluffier and the air was simply easier to breathe. She felt like she was finally home, although she had only been there for a couple days. She connected with each animal on a spiritual level, a cat most of all. She didn't know where her future in Wonderland would take her, but she sure wanted to find out..
(Photo from: Sir John Tenniel)
Bibliography: Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll
Author's Note: I read Alice in Wonderland by Lewis Carroll this week. This has always been a really interesting, but a little confusing story to me. I had actually never read the book before this class, I had only seen the most recent version of the movie. After doing some research about the book, I found out that Lewis Carroll actually had a mental condition that caused him to hallucinate and see things that weren't actually there. The book made a lot more sense to me after realizing he incorporated some of those ideas into his stories. I decided to mix up my version of the story a little bit by introducing it as a news story on TV. Since Alice's family isn't featured a lot in the actual story, I wanted them to play a bigger role in my creation of it. I assume if this was a real situation, the family would be wondering where their daughter went, so I had Alice's mother speaking on the news about her disappearance. Then, I followed up with an explanation about where she was and how she got there. My story focuses a little less on the actual occurrences in Wonderland, to make it more similar to something that could actually happen.
There are some neat ideas here. Cameras and television implying a somewhat modernized version of Alice's world and Wonderland, there's a conflict of running away, and you have a penchant for attractive scenery.
ReplyDeleteYou seem to want to focus on a television or technology-influenced world, so it would do well if we could see more of that. For instance, what's the Mad Hatter watching? Does technology play a role in the Queen of Hearts' kingdom?
It would help to refine the conflict a bit more, since some of the events are a bit strange. Example: Alice intends to return home, feeling bad for leaving her family, yet is described as perfectly content in Wonderland.
In conclusion, I see potential here with the idea of a technologically savvy Wonderland, and Alice's conflict. However, the conflict itself feels a bit unfinished and bare, and the world could take a few steps further with the technology. You have plenty of headroom in the word count to add and refine, so I'm certain you can whip something up!
Wow, I really enjoyed reading your story, Jamie! Placing Alice's family on TV is a genius way to incorporate how they are reacting to her disappearance as well as show the guilt she feels at leaving them. I don't blame her though with how fantastic Wonderland seems! I think it would be cool to expand on the relationship with the cat more or perhaps switch to another TV clip of her family searching for her! Just a few ideas since the story is on the shorter side and is a very interesting idea to begin with. Overall, I really enjoyed your writing style as well as reading your story. I look forward to more of your work!
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